WebParenTips The Online Parenting Newsletter vol.8 no.8, August 1, 2007

WebParenTips - The Online Parenting Newsletter
vol.8 no.8, August 1, 2007


HIGH EXPECTATIONS FOR LEARNING

It’s still hot outdoors but the calendar tells us that school is starting soon.

I am convinced that a child’s success at school depends largely on the parents. If the parents think that school is the most important thing in their children’s lives and have high expectations of their children’s performance, school success is more likely.

How do parents convey these values to their children? Early and often. Parents not only provide books and crayons to their young children but show enthusiasm for their children’s interest and industry in mastering learning.

The way you talk about school, how you interact with your child’s teachers, and how you react to your child’s progress all will convey the important message. "I expect you to do well at school."

Some parents are hesitant to say this out loud because they don’t want to put pressure on their child. Hogwash! In my opinion you should say you have high expectations and keep the pressure on! If you don’t your kids may think you don’t care or that you are indifferent to their performance at school. Better you push your child than ignore how the child is doing.

I was pushed to do well at school. My parents (and grandparents and aunts) always asked me about my grades and took an interest in my papers and art work and the books I was reading. They praised my high grades and frowned at the lower ones saying, "You can do better!" And I believed them.

Unfortunately pushing became unfashionable. We might injure the little darling’s delicate self-esteem! Horrors, not that! But self-esteem rests on two pillars and needs both pillars to stay up there: one pillar is engraved with the words "I am loved." and the other says "I am competent." The child needs to feel both loved and competent. Doing well at school is a great measure of competence.

In summary, expect the best of your child. Let the child know that you expect the best. And work closely with the school so you always know how your child is doing. School is your child’s job. Conveying your high expectations is your job.