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Everybody knows what a HASSLE is. Hassles are those little annoyances that occur every day in everybody’s life. They can not be avoided, they can only be endured.
The other day when I seemed to be getting more than my share of Hassles I asked myself how come? I realized that, though one can minimize some Hassles by leaving early to avoid the morning traffic for example, hassles are random events. Traffic stopped because of an accident up ahead cannot be controlled no matter when you leave the house. Wow, I realized, not only can’t we control randomness there isn’t even a God of Randomness to pray to.
Then I had a breakthrough brainstorm: maybe I can balance my Hassles with HAPPYS. Maybe good things that make me feel good are happening that I don’t even pay attention to. Maybe I take them for granted. These little Happys are random too, but are a lot more fun to deal with.
Guess what? I started focusing on the Happys. Little things like traffic volume being so low I could safely cross three lanes of traffic from my entrance to the next exit. My favorite treadmill at the gym was free. The line at the market was short. All random events but appreciated.
Then the strangest thing happened. Counting my Happys meant I was no longer focused on my Hassles. Automatically my stress levels seemed to go down and the sun seemed to shine more brightly.
So notice and count your Happys. This will make you happier than counting your Hassles. The better mood you are in, the more Happys your children will feel. When the kids are old enough teach them all about randomness and how to count their Happys.
Marilyn Heins, M.D.
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=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-==-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Dr. Marilyn Heins is a Tucson pediatrician, parenting columnist for the Arizona Daily Star, author of the book, ParenTips, as well as a mother, stepmother and grandmother. She is available for workshops and lectures to groups of parents, teachers, and grandparents. See: Dr. Heins’ Lectures =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-==-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
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